d'oh!

so imma try out a new email address. This gmail thing is kind of interesting.

Bwah!

I am thoroughly sick of math. And I really, really, really, need to study for history. I don't think I've learned anything from history this year. Then again, I'm not sure I learned anything last year either.

Prom may be quite fun. I'm looking forward to it. Odd. I was kind of stressed out earlier, but then I was thinking about it today and realized that I don't really care; I'll have fun no matter who I go with. As long as I'm not left alone on the dance floor, or something.

I want to do Elitch's physics night this year! Come on, who else wants to go? You know you all do.

I need a ride to Marie Callendar's this Saturday and next. Hmph. I'll have to hit someone up. Hopefully there's at least one person who likes me enough to lug me around that's going. But I wanted rides to both, because I'm taking both AP and IB! Why am I such a fool?

Where has Sarah gone? She hasn't been at clubs lately. Then again, AP tests are coming up. I'ma hang out with Fox after school the next few days. Maybe I can actually get a decent grade on the physics test. God knows I'm not going to excel at math or history.

Oh, jeez, I seriously need to call Nikki. Gah!

bleeding heart

As Greg pointed out to me today, for someone who considers herself more conservative than liberal, I sure do have a "bleeding heart." Ha ha. This was provoked by my spewing off of some measles trivia Eric had told me (Did you know that 800 000 children around the world die every year from measles? And that it's a incredibly easy disease to prevent? It takes less than a dollar to give a child a measle vaccination!), so I can see his point. Still, I don't really think I'm all that liberal. I'm fairly sure that I'm not really liberal or conservative, I'm just a moderate libertarian. Go libertarianism!

At any rate, my political leanings tend to be influenced by the people around me. Gindele was definitely liberal... during freshman year I was more liberal. Johnson, not so much, Chaffin, not so much. So in sophomore year, I was more conservative. In junior year I wasn't really one way or the other but I was probably slightly conservative. Now I hang out with the art kids and the amnesty kids and the red cross kids so I'm slightly more liberal again. Add that to the fact that I hate Bush, and there you go.

As Winston Churchill might have said (erm, according to my mom's horrible misquotation, anyways):

"If you're young and not a liberal, you have no heart. If you're old and not conservative, you've got no brain."

*evil cackle*

Hey, check it out, Chaffin. For college students: 6th Annual Essay Contest on Ayn Rand�s Novel ATLAS SHRUGGED
Entry Deadline: September 16, 2004

I mean, we'd technically be college students by September, right?

Hmmm...

yup. ^.^

He's now officially number one on my ladder. Sorry, Eric.

teehee.

Oh, my birthday was so fun. So fun!

Notable events:

* fried matzo for breakfast, followed by twinkie tiramisu. woot!
* taking pictures with my new digi camera, after sacrificing my calculator batteries
* teasing greg for having overslept through a period and a half
* actually "getting" the lit essay
* eating lunch with moreno and eric
* getting a balloon from the main office... yeesh! it was rather embarassing, I must say
* getting out of history an hour early... but is this really a notable event?
* waiting for 2 hours for nikki to be done with her field trip... gah
* getting picked up by sarah and alex and riding shotgun
* "My little Jessa's all grown up!" Gotta love it.
* haha, the tales of interrogation during calc.
* having shivani and danika (and tara, woot) show up at chipotle, like, 40 minutes late
* watching as chaffin kept trying to steal sarah's money
* riding to arapahoe crossings
* accompanying chaffin to the theater to save seats
* KILL BILL! oh, it was awesome. the sheer awesomeness surpasses the capability of human expression...
* talking about the movie afterwards... the scene with Uma Thurman and Daryl Hannah... oh god it was beautiful.
* listening to chaffin complain about I, Robot
* making a sims house
* hearing nikki complain about the fact that nobody died in the fires caused by her indoor fireworks

As for the present opening. Received gifts include:

$100 borders gift card (grandma and grandpa)
$25 borders gift card (bubbie)
amethyst heart-shaped earrings (aunt wendy)
envelope necklace (uncle jon and aunt ruth)
a bunch of stuff from mommy:
(bath / body / lotion stuff)
(nail polish / nail care stuff)
(computer stuff):
[sims hot date expansion]
[sims making magic expansion]
[paper mouse pad (for writing notes)]
[digital camera (cheap so i can bring it on our trip this summer)]
(charm bracelet stuff)
(purple bathroom accessories stuff)
(blue t-shirt)
(karaoke cds)
3 t-shirts from daddy:
(cu "buffaloes" shirt)
(cu "colorado" shirt)
(oct 31 = dec 25 shirt)
kill bill vol. one (nikki)
maroon 5 cd (nikki)
best buy gift card (shiv & danika)
necklace & bath stuff (tara)
2 as yet unknown music cds (greg)
kill bill vol. 2 movie ticket (sarah)
chipotle burrito (nikki)

I made out like a bandit! But seriously, I feel so loved right now.

Oh, and apparently, Sarah, he would have asked me to prom regardless. But, heh, he seemed to find your conversation amusing. And, eh, at least he's done with the asking now. I don't have to wait for it.

All in all, twas an excellent day. I'm quite grateful to all my friends who wished me a happy birthday or participated in the chipotle and/or movie.

dude

What, is it past midnight? this computer's running slow again.

ayn rand essay - completed!

I submitted it... ten minutes ago. Take that, Chaffin! Though I'll admit it's not my best work. Not really that much competition now is it? Oh well, hopefully most of the people who bothered to enter will be like that dumb kid who didn't read the book. They'll all probably talk about charity, because that's what adults usually want to hear. Haha! Ok, maybe not. But here's hoping.

partay!

Or not. Well, ok. Anyone wanna come on friday? It's been decided that 6pm or so we'll go to Chipotle and eat food. Mmm, food. Between 7 and 8 we'll go see Kill Bill, vol. 2. All of you are welcome to come to either! But if you wanna come to the movie, you gotta let me (or Sarah) know so tickets can be purchased before the theater fills up. Also, if you're going to come to either it'd be cool if you'd comment on this entry and let me know.

^.^

yet another reason to love The Cure

current song: Blink 182 - Always

Boulder's gonna be fun. Anime Anonymous

I wanna procrastinate some more... don't wanna do my overdue physics homework... don't wanna study for the Vietnam test... don't wanna fill out the contract sheet for CAS... don't wanna do the math assignments I've been skipping...

So I bought two new CDs yesterday. The new Blink 182 cd, and the self-titled Fountains of Wayne cd. I'm enjoying them both so far. The best part of the Blink 182 cd is that one of the tracks is sung by Robert Smith. Gotta love it. I'ma point that out to Greg next time I see him.

Today's Sunday. More significantly, it's Easter Sunday. This is probably the first Easter where we've done absolutely nothing. I mean, last year I got some candy, and for a long time my parents set up easter egg hunts around the house (so fun!). I'm probably too old for that now anyway. And I won't even be home next year. Erm, living at home. Of course I'll be with my family around this time next year. But I may not come home every weekend, so unless Easter's on the same weekend as my birthday, I probably won't be there for Easter. Hmmm...

Maybe I should eat some matzo. I haven't celebrated passover since I was, like, six. Is it already over? Eh. At any rate, I'm not even sure what you're supposed to do for it anymore. The only parts I remember are eating pieces of matzo and sipping on some nasty tasting red wine. Blech. When I have kids, I'm gonna let 'em drink red wine if they want, it's so bitter they'll be put off alcohol for years, I bet.

Ownership of guns is rather controversial in my mind. If my uncle hadn't had twelve billion guns lying around, he'd probably still be alive. Conversely, if alcohol didn't exist he'd also probably still be alive. But, I mean, it says in the constitution that we can have 'em. And, I mean, it depends on how you use them. Listening to tales of shooting tin cans and jars of spaghetti sauce made my day. Strange how it works.

He didn't live exclusively in Maryland, he also lived in Texas and Colorado a bit before that. So I wouldn't get freaked out about it, Nikki.

quarter grades

Aargh. I got a C- in math for quarter. Methinks I should talk to Cavnar. I really don't want a C on my semester grades.

My parents are displeased. There's the C-, and I have an incomplete in physics (actually, I have a D, but considering how freaked out they were about the C-, I suspect the 'I' was actually less annoying to deal with), and I have a B in history. But the rest are A's, dammit. You think they'd be more forgiving, considering I had two bloody F's at midquarter and I managed to bring one of them up to an A and the other to a B. And they kept harping on the C-. It was a C at midquarter, it hasn't gone down that much. And it was really nice when dad dismissed my two art classes - "Oh, wow, you got an A in pottery and photo... big surprise" - and one of my core classes because I've "always had an A in that class." And so then they chastised me for not getting an A+ in that class. Oh, no, such a shame, no plus. Grrrr. Stupid grades. Stupid parents.

I hope McElreath saw my CAS stuff. I'm going to find her. But, eh, I didn't do the contracts because 1) I didn't understand how to and 2) I thought it was due, like, the day before spring break and I didn't have them at that point. Apparently she's not mailing them until, like, May 1, so that means I should have time to get the stupid contract explained and make some more for the other two activities I performed.

So, wow. Indeed, I find this amazing, but I may actually graduate from IB, still. No sending off of my physics labs. The dossier's done, if crappy. No sending off of anything, actually, except math. And hopefully not CAS. Please not CAS. I think everyone in IB would be happier if they just didn't ask to send anyone's CAS stuff.

... So Kill Bill Vol. 2 opens on my birthday, does it? I guess I'll just HAVE to go, then. What say you, Nikki?

(essays and dreams)

19th Annual Essay Contest on Ayn Rand's Novel THE FOUNTAINHEAD

First Prize: $10,000 Cash Award
5 Second Prizes: $2,000 Cash Awards
10 Third Prizes: $1,000 Cash Awards
35 Finalist Prizes: $100 Cash Awards
200 Semifinalist Prizes: $50 Cash Awards

Damn. It's due next thursday. And I thought I had time. Yeesh. Better get cracking. *grin*

If he doesn't get $10,000 from this, my faith in humankind will be destroyed. Ok, not really. But he still better get some money. I'm optimistic about my chances, as well.

... What's Smoky's address?

Oh, mum found the return envelope so I've sent my reply (and my $200 enrolment [haha! enrolment!] deposit) to Boulder. Hopefully I'll have all those I's *cough cough* cleared up by the time I send my final transcript, so they'll still want me. Jebus, I hope I pass CAS. Urk.

The pizza I ate for lunch was good, but I think it burned the roof of my mouth. Ow.

I had the weirdest dream a couple nights ago. Like, I was in this room standing in the middle of this big group of people I knew, and Ian was standing at the front of the room, talking, or something. It might have been the sixty. Though I'm not sure I knew about the second one at the time I dreamed this. Hmmm. But anyway, I wandered off and went to this pet store, but the owner lady was real mean and lured this little dragon fluffball creature to eat a trail of flowers, or something, then trapped it in a transparent pringles can. And as I left I saw this monkey swinging around in the backroom. And Eric and Chaffin were hanging out together, and Eric started watching the Grinch, the animated version thing. But, yeah, the weirdest part was that Eric had a twin brother, who was looking for him. He's like, "Where's Eric? Do you know?" and then I realized that Chaffin and Eric had stolen my car. So I got a ride home from Kym instead. Yeah, that was a fun dream.

4 Things


Name 4 things you have done today:
- cooked
- played video games
- showered
- went grocery shopping

Name 4 things you are thinking about right now:
- my friends
- "let down" by radiohead
- trivia
- disappointments

Name 4 scents you love:
- vanilla
- bread baking
- incense
- breathmints

Name 4 things you'd never wear:
- thong
- tongue ring
- bikini
- cocktail dress

Name the last 4 things you have bought:
- the darkness cd
- la oreja de van gogh cd
- lunch
- movie snacks

Name 4 things drinks you regularly drink:
- rootbeer
- skim milk
- orange soda
- nestea

Name 4 bands/groups most people don't know you like:
- dashboard confessional
- good charlotte
- sting
- eminem

Name 4 bad habits you have:
- biting my fingernails
- picking my nose
- fidgeting
- burping

Name 4 things you wish you had:
- a boyfriend
- motivation
- a longer attention span
- the ability to play an instrument

Name 4 people who know you best:
- my mom
- my dad
- my best friend
- my locker buddy

This survey was taken at powersugoi.net!

Japanese or Korean
What Language Are You?

who knows?

current song: the darkness - love is only a feeling

So I'm going to Boulder. I got letters of apology from Chicago and Northwestern earlier this week. I guess I'm kind of sad. I mean, it kind of sucks that they didn't deem me "good enough." But, whatever. I wasn't crushed or anything. I think I'm really looking forward to Boulder. At least they appreciate me. I have a merit scholarship there (if I can find the letter...) and some woman from the computer science actually called me just to answer questions and tell me that they'd really like to have me attend Boulder. Boulder probably likes me better than the other schools because it didn't see my midterms. Two I's probably don't look too great on a college application.

He came over to my house on Friday. I left science bowl early, and he picked me up and we played video games. And on Sunday we went to see Secret Window, which was actually quite good. His family didn't come this time. But afterwards I went over to his house and we played more video games, and ate dinner (bratwurst!) and watched X. Which was creepy, I might add, too many beheadings for my tastes. And then when the protagonist sat there crying and cradling the head... I mean, come on. And I talked to him on Thursday, and apparently we're going shopping on Sunday. I feel kind of dumb, I mean, surely there's something that'd be more entertaining than shopping? But I can't think of anything, and going to another movie would be a bit ridiculous.

But, meh. Listening to The Darkness is a bit... odd. It makes me think about him, that's all. And I don't know. I feel bad. I hope he gets into Boulder, but even if he doesn't, community college isn't bad. That's what Stacey's doing, after all. It just feels strange. I always think of him as so brilliant and it's just wrong, somehow, that colleges don't see that because of the grades. And it feels wrong that he can't go to Reed because it costs too much. Why does money have to be an issue? It's not an issue for me! It's unfair that it's not an issue for me, and I'm not even going to a "good" college! I mean, this means that my parents will be much better off in terms of finances, of course, and my college fund will actually be able to pay for it ALL, not just the first year. And my grandparents won't have to give us so much. But, I mean, I could have gone to a more expensive college, my parents aren't telling me not to, they're encouraging me. Why is that? I hate the unfairness of it. Why do I have to be so lucky? I don't deserve it as much as my friends do. Why aren't they luckier than me? When is my karma going to realize it's made a mistake?

Oh, well. That was long, and rambling, and pointless.

Well, I hung out with Nikki on Wednesday, which was good. That and Sunday made up for the lack of trivia. Especially talking to him about it. I actually told him! I told him I was kind of upset, and I felt much better afterwards. Because I was kind of upset. I wish they'd called. I suppose I shouldn't expect it, though. I have this idea that I'm friends with them, but I'm not even that good of a friend, am I? Maybe I should work on that. I bet I could be better. They do deserve it. I deserve it, too, but I suppose you've got to give to receive. Or something equally corny or clichèd.