belief

I don't think I've ever been happier...

I've thought of a ... term of endearment. But I'll only use it in my own mind, never out loud... maybe, someday, I'll use it aloud, but only when I talk to him.

For the first time ever, Cam told me "TMI!" I didn't think it was possible... maybe because he's starting to think that my jokes may be less joke and more truth.

I am insecure, unsure, full of self doubt, fearful of being inadequate, scared of my own inabilities. I think I have the ability... but I cannot examine my ability too closely, because I may not like what I find. I am flawed, but somehow, it doesn't seem to matter so much anymore...

And I don't care what others think! If you think I've done something wrong or scandalous, then it proves to me that you don't know me at all. I am hesitant in small matters, so how could I brush off something so big, so important to me? I could not. I would not. I will not, when the time comes. Though it will be a long time from now, I trust.