finally done with college apps

Wow... a whole 23 hours before they're due!

a return to normality normalcy

Noooooooooo! I was going to call, I remembered even, but we watched a movie. And I was too dumb to figure out that it would end so late. Probably doesn't help that we watched the special features... Yep, that's right, I just watched Star Trek: Nemesis. Hooray.

Today I drove for an hour and 15 minutes, so I'm that much closer to my license. I really hope I get it before March, when my permit expires (again). So many hours left...

We have our doggie back (my hoodie is completely covered in fur) and things are finally getting back to normal. Since I got absolutely no work done last week, I'm going to have to crack down starting tomorrow. Aaargh.

home sweet home

Well, I'm back from my travels in Phoenix. I experienced the joys of LOTR, Arcosanti, bad food, better food, Adaptation, souvenir shopping, botanical gardens, cacti, christmas bushes, wet suits, water, art galleries, Scottsdale, picture-taking, the Mystery Castle, and more. Stuff happened, it was enjoyable, but now I'm tired and I'm going to go to bed.

Soylent Green is people!

It kind of makes me hate his mom. It's like when my dad takes a fatalist attitude about IB. He doesn't think I'm going to pull it off, so he asks me if I really need to do all the crap I'm doing. I have a hard enough time trying to deal with it without him telling me it's pointless... Of course, thanks to my combative nature (which I got from him, what do you know), I find myself making excuses to do the work, to do the extended essay or the ib exams, and I end up believing them myself.

I don't see why you can't just take out loans. If I were in the same situation, I'd ask how much my mom would be willing to spend max. Then, if I could get the rest of it in loans and scholarships, why would I have to go to a particular school? Maybe it's just college, but if you settle for something you don't want now, how do you know you won't do it again in the future? What about your first job? Your second? Your career? Your life? OK, so maybe that doesn't make much sense... but too bad. But ignore what I just said, anyways, because I'm not in the same position, and I don't have to worry about money being a criterion for college choice, because my parents will support me in whatever school I choose. Note, however, that I'm not applying to Harvard or Yale, and Boulder remains one of my top choices.

Well, other than the more icky stuff, I must say that:

- taco bell is cool, in all of its ghetto glory
- Paul Simon is awesome
- Soylent Green is one of the cheesiest movies. EVER
- I find the strangest things sexy
- trivial pursuit should be played more often
- Eric remains awesome
- riding in other people's cars is hella fun

Dude, I brought my camera, but being a dumbass, forgot to take pictures of the people I don't have any pictures of, and wanted most. Not strictly true; I at least got Srav. Oh, and Chris, at lunch. But still. Damn.

and even better

I forgot to mention... I have new dice now. They're purty.

almost there...

Okay, so wearing earrings today was not such a good idea. Ow...

I felt surprisingly attractive for having tangled strands of neon orange plastic clumped around me.

So, missing Wednesday. That might hurt me in terms of the math test on Friday. I'm not going to be at all prepared. I haven't done any of the homework for it. Normally I'd have spent tonight working on that, but instead (dun dun dun) I worked on the stupid math ia. Still not done. I have the urge to stab it to death. Either that or turn it in incomplete. Stupid thing.

I wonder if anything's happening tomorrow?

When I leave on Sunday, I'm going to have to bring all my homework. Dammit. Let's see what I should do over break:

- finish my extended essay
- finish the writing sections on college apps
- do sections a & b on the dossier
- do the comp sci ib sl practice test / semester final
- do all the horrible cas paperwork
- write out the italy, germany, and spain parts of the history final

and, most importantly,

- watch lord of the rings
- hang out with nikki
- get my photos developed
- play more M:tG
- if possible, play more D&D

That should do it. Maybe.

I'm gonna bring my digital camera to school tomorrow. I'm done with the black and white, but I still want pictures of people. Hooray. I just like taking pictures of people, it's a way of recording my memories. I have a pretty bad time of it just trying to remember things now. Pictures will help a lot when I'm older and even more absent-minded.

tamarrah, tamarrah, I love ya, tamarrah, yer only a day awaaaaaiiiiiy!

sneeze

urk... I feel sickly... methinks I have a cold.

Mom's pretty sure she has the flu. Meh.

Knowledge Bowl this week was sad. There were all of five people there. And three pizzas.

I really really really can't wait for school to be over. Even though it means my destruction. The math ia, the physics hw, the history test, the extended essay, the history ia, the cas, the dossier, the horror.

I guess I'm supposed to wear something eye-catching for Thursday, for Amnesty International. Meh. I don't have any extravagant clothing. I don't feel very creative either.

Tomorrow I get to sleep in! Hooray!

Sunday I'm leaving for Phoenix, and I don't get back till the following Sunday... I guess the second week I'll be doing much homework. Especially the extended essay, since I'm going to have Parsons look at it... on friday! Wow, that's not even a school day. It's 'cause I'm so dedicated to this essay, you see. Not really. He's like, "How about I look it over during break?" So, yeah.

Dad's home with ice cream now... hooray. I must go devour junk food.

sweetness...

sushipartybox.com

d'oh!

dahhh... my dad yelled at me around 9 for not doing my hw, so I went and cowered... But, meh, I remember now, and I feel bad, and I missed out. *looks at clock* Yeah, not going to work, now is it? Dangit. Hopefully there's tomorrow. If not... I'll be sad.

I've been working on my extended essay. I keep reading more about Kant, and realizing I've screwed up in my approximation of his philosophy, and having to rewrite my paper... but hey, it works.

Yesterday was insane. I didn't actually get to play, even though I stayed at Alex's until, what, eleven? I don't know, that seems kind of sad, that we weren't even ready to play until after eleven. There were too many people there, though, which kind of added to the slowness. I don't know, every time I talk to Lisa, I feel like she's high, or something, even though I'm sure she's not. Oh, and Ned's lost my communist catalogue. Too bad. Not like I was particularly attached to the thing... Oh, but, I feel kind of bad for smushing snow in Eric's hair, but hey, he deserved it...

Ok, I know it makes no sense, but you'll just have to deal.

I want more glass candy.

Almost Winter Break! Yes!! Although that is an indicator that assignments are looming... *contemplates the important CAS meeting she missed*

From Kant's "On the Proverb: That May be True in Theory, But is of No Practical Use", 1793:

The complete equality of men as subjects in a nation is completely consistent with the greatest inequality in the quantity and degree of possessions they have, whether these be physical or mental superiority over others, or fortuitously acquired external goods, or, to speak generally, rights (of which there can be many) with respect to others. And, thus, the welfare of one very much depends on the will of another (that of the poor on that of the rich) � Nonetheless, as regards right�they are as subjects all equal to one another. For no one can coerce anyone else except through public law�but through this everyone else can resist him in the same way; no one can lose this authority to coerce�others except by breaking the law; and no one can renounce this right, i.e, no one can make a contract or perform some rightful act whereby he has no rights but only duties, for in so doing he would rob himself of the right to make a contract and would consequently cancel the contract itself.

From this idea of the equality of men as subjects in the commonwealth also comes this formula: Every member of the commonwealth must be permitted to attain any degree of status (to which a subject can aspire) to which his talent, his industry, and his luck may bring him; and his fellow subjects may not block his way by [appealing to] hereditary prerogatives (as the privilege belonging to a particular class) and thereby eternally hinder him and his descendants� no person can bequeath to his descendants the privilege of status he has within the commonwealth; nor, consequently, can anyone forcibly prevent them from attaining by virtue of their own merit even higher steps in the hierarchy� A person may bequeath everything else as long as it is material (and does not pertain to his person), for it can be acquired and disposed of by him as property, and thus a sequence of generations can bring about considerable inequality in financial circumstances among the members of a commonwealth (between wage earners and employers, and land-owners and agricultural workers, etc.). But a person is prevented from hindering others when their talent, industry, and good fortune make it possible for them to rise to circumstances equal to his. Otherwise a person would have to be able to coerce without being subject to coercive resistance from others, and that goes beyond the status of a fellow-subject. Except through some transgression of his own, no person who lives in the state of right obtaining in a commonwealth can lose this equality� for there is no act (neither his own nor that of another) that conforms with right whereby he can terminate his possession of himself and thus enter into the class of domestic animals, which can be used in any capacity one desires and can be kept in that state without their consent as long as one pleases, even given the restrictions (which is sometimes sanctioned by religion, as among the Indians) not to disfigure or kill them. A person�s state can be regarded as fortunate if only he is aware that his failure to rise to status equal to that of others is due to himself alone (his abilities or earnestness of will) or to circumstances for which he can blame no one else, and not because of the irresistible will of another. For in regard to rights, a person�s fellow-subjects in the commonwealth have no advantage over him.

ow

...my back hurts.

Snow can be evil. My dad's work is 15 minutes away, and it took him an hour and a half to get home.

D&D was very fun.

I saw quite a few people in the halls today. Nodded to Katsnelson - twice. Nodded at Chris. Talked to Nick. Was annoyed by Garrett. Talked to Ann. Walked with Greg (d'oh... no more car... how sad). Exchanged a few sentences with Ned. Said hi to Joey, I believe. Said hi to Corey. Avoided Baylee's glare of death. (I'm sorry I stole your fries!) Was accosted by Droege (ok, not really, he said hello to me). Asked the evil Ms. Kelley how she was doing (oh god, the horrors of middle school). I could have sworn there were more of them... they just keep coming. It's a good thing, though.

I need to, one of these days, do some homework.

Since I can't concentrate on researching for my EE:
http://pages.prodigy.net/scifi20/essay9+5.htm

the college applications from hell

Hey, it's better than doing homework.

Oh, by the way: my launchcast station. Behold.

I reused my Merit Scholarship essay on the Boulder application. Mwahaha! It didn't even require an essay... How sad. But I'm planning on applying to U Chicago and Northwestern too (they don't require SAT II's - hooray!), and they require a crapload of essays. Northwestern wants an essay, approximately 300 words on why you want to go there, and four short paragraph questions, such as "What's a movie you're embarassed of liking?" Ummm... And then Chicago wants a paragraph on why you want to go there ("How does the University of Chicago, as you know it now, satisfy your desire for a particular kind of learning, community, and future?") and a paragraph on your favorite books, plays, etc. And an essay. But the topics are strange:

1. "One of the very nicest things about life," as Luciano Pavarotti once said, "is the way we must regularly stop whatever it is we are doing and devote our attention to eating." Pavarotti, in all of his well-fed wisdom, suggests that eating and meals are a separate kind of activity � often a break from the work and play of life. Yet food and meals sustain our lives in many ways every day. Tell us about an ordinary food or meal that may seem mundane to the rest of the world but holds special meaning for you. Think about how the food is prepared, packaged, or served and by whom. Do you eat it in a distinctive manner? At a special time? In a certain place or with select company? Most importantly, explain how this everyday food sustains or satisfies you in a way that another food or meal could not.



2. If you could balance on a tightrope, over what landscape would you walk? (No net.)



3. In his autobiography A Long Walk to Freedom, Nelson Mandela writes, "There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered." Tell us about an unchanging place to which you have returned. In what way has the place never changed? How does its constancy reveal changes in you?



4. Albert Einstein once said, "The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science." Propose your own original theory to explain one of the sixteen mysteries below. Your theory does not need to be testable or even probable; however, it should provide some laws, principles, and/or causes to explain the facts, phenomena, or existence of one of these mysteries. You can make your theory artistic, scientific, conspiracy-driven, quantum, fanciful, or otherwise ingenious � but be sure it is your own and gives us an impression of how you think about the world.
   
   Love, Crop Circles, Time Travel, Numbers, Non-Dairy Creamer, The Platypus, Language, Mona Lisa�s Smile, Sleep and Dreams, The Beginning of Everything, The End of Everything, The College Rankings in U.S. News & World Report, Gray, Art, The Roanoke Colony, Consciousness



5. Take as a model the students who inspired Options 1�4 as you pose and respond to an uncommon prompt of your own. If your prompt is original and thoughtful, then you should have little trouble writing a great essay. Draw on your best qualities as a writer, thinker, visionary, social critic, sage, sensible woman or man, citizen of the world, or future citizen of the University of Chicago; take a little risk and have fun.

So, basically, there're 4 topics, and then if you want to do #5 you have to be all CREATIVE. Blech. Ok, not really, but it requires way too much brain power than I can give right now. I'm most interested in number 4, but I'm kind of tempted by number 2. I'd walk over an abyss, yo. Hahahaha. Not really. Oh, just go read Zarathustra, you ignorant fools.

I'm mostly annoyed with all the crap they want me to print out and have teachers/counselors fill out. Speaking of my counselor, she's only known me for, what, 3 months? Course, I'm kind of glad Watkins isn't filling out the recommendations, she creeped me out. Don't know exactly why.

thinking

current song: end of a century - blur

Odd.

The snake is the woman, the mouse is the man, and she has taken his life away and consumed him. He will never escape her. There will never be another mouse...

I want these, in purple.

Somehow things seem sharper. Like the crispness of a photograph when the background is entirely out of focus. It makes the subject seem that much clearer, cleaner, more important. I guess I'm just in one of those "moods". It's nice. I enjoy thinking about things.

comment, damn you

I've now added a tagboard. So... ha! Or something.

already sick of the layout

...so here's a (kind of) new one.

guilt attacks

I ate a string cheese yesterday, and thought of Nathan...

And I snuck into Parsons' mobile and was poking around (I was bored, ok?), and I saw a yellow legal pad with his handwriting. So I picked it up and started reading. I wasn't really thinking about it, until a page fell out and what I was doing hit me. I felt really terrible. I mean, he's shown me some of his stuff before, and he had given it to Parsons, but it's still private, and he didn't know I was looking at it, and he didn't let me. As soon as I realized what I was doing, I stopped reading, but that doesn't really help. So I felt really bad, and I feel bad, and I don't know what to do about it.

If I had seen him, I would have given him a string cheese for his birthday.

Friday is going to be so awesome. I was worried we'd never get to play, but apparently the nerds are interested after all. Hooray! And there certainly are a lot of them.

I'm glad to report that Taifur knows my first name. Sometimes I worry that they think of me as "that weird girl who sits at our lunch table but never says anything." I suppose they could still think that, but just know my name in addition... Oh, well, never mind.

Everybody's been sick lately. I considered bringing a box of kleenex to school, Eric's been stealing Shivani's pocket kleenex because there's no kleenex boxes in the math classroom. The flu's been going around, Dad's getting sick, and Nikki's recovering from her near-fatal sinus infection and asthma attacks. Yeesh.

thanks

I happened upon the badger dance... rather frightening.

I didn't put up all the things I'm thankful for. Many other people seem to have done so. I wonder if I should. I am thankful for things, and for people. Just because I don't write them down doesn't mean I'm not. But I wonder if I ought to write them down, even though it doesn't change the fact that I'm thankful, because it changes how people see themselves or me, maybe. I don't know. Perhaps...

It seems like the kind of thing you see on an album, the list of people the band thanks. It just seems strange to me. I don't know.

Thankful...


• that my dad didn't ruin the turkey.
• that Let it Be...Naked is out.
• for DDR.
• for someone to dance with.
• for stuffing.
• that the mashed potatoes turned out.
• that I know more than I did before.
• for memories.
• that Uncle Scott isn't in pain anymore.
• for my parents.
• for baby pictures.
• for music.
• for medication.
• that I don't have to take it if I don't want to.
• that I have friends.
• for Nikki's phone calls and patience.
• for Baylee's sense of humor.
• for Alex's and Srav's sarcasm.
• that Megann always says hello, even when others won't.
• that Sarah comes to clubs.
• for Claire's calm presence.
• for Eric's insanity.
• for Chaffin's bad puns and philosophical debates.
• for Alex's guitar.
• for Amy's and Eddie's forwards.
• for Kym's texting.
• for Ivey and Melissa and their tolerance.
• that I can still email Stacey, even though she's graduated.
• for the juniors (and the sophomores).
• for weblogs.
• for the people that read this weblog.
• that I'm not alone in the universe.

happy thanksgiving

Well then. Yesterday was thanksgiving. My dad's birthday, as well. I gave him that remote controlled car, which immediately malfunctioned. We blame it on the batteries. We watched Kiki's Delivery Service, which was entertaining. Dad burned the turkey, but mom managed to salvage it and it ended up being quite tasty. I made the mash potatoes, which also, surprisingly, turned out tastily. The cranberry sauce was a problem, as I couldn't get it out of the can, and attempted to do so by using a straw to suck out cranberry sauce and then vomit it back up into the bowl. Ah, well.

I keep swinging between depression and non-depression today, and it's really very annoying. Ah well.

something to think about...

TEVYE
Do you love me?

GOLDE
Do I what?

TEVYE
Do you love me?

GOLDE
Do I love you?

TEVYE
Well?

GOLDE
With our daughters getting married
And there's trouble in the town
You're upset, you're worn-out
Go inside, go lie down
Maybe it's indigestion!

TEVYE
Golde, I'm asking you a question
Do you love me?

GOLDE
You're a fool!

TEVYE
I know! But do you love me?

GOLDE
Do I love you?

TEVYE
Well?

GOLDE
For twenty-five years I've washed your clothes
Cooked your meals, cleaned the house
Given you children, milked your cow
After twenty-five years, why talk about love right now?

TEVYE
Golde, the first time I saw you
Was on our wedding day
I was scared

GOLDE
I was shy

TEVYE
I was nervous

GOLDE
So was I

TEVYE
But my father and my mother said
We'd learn to love each other
So now I'm asking you, Golde
Do you love me?

GOLDE
I'm your wife!

TEVYE
I know! But do you love me?

GOLDE
Do I love him?

TEVYE
Well?

GOLDE
For twenty-five years I've lived with him
Fought with him, starved with him
Twenty-five years my bed is his
If that's not love, what is?

TEVYE
Then you love me!

GOLDE
I suppose I do

TEVYE
And I suppose I love you, too

no pictures

I'm starting to get sick of this no pictures thing. I need more than boxes, dangit! And without pics, I don't know how!

Ah, well. Here's a rainbow design. Maybe it'll last for a while.

I'm looking forward to tea day.

Wheeeeeeeeee! Thanksgiving break! I give thanks, oh Lord, that you have granted us five days of solace from the hell on earth you have placed us in. Thursday is not only thanksgiving, but my dad's birfday. I got him a remote controlled car to torture the dog with. He really likes small motorized toys that he can use for chasing her around the house.

do you see the seashell?

Even if you do, it may not last long...

now it's time to say goodnight...
Good night
Sleep tight

Dreams, sweet dreams for you
Dreams, sweet dreams for me

cowie <3

what am I to do?

Today was mom's birthday. Friday was Hugh's and Nathan's. Thursday, I believe, was Nikki's dad's.

What am I going to do with myself? I feel lost, somehow. I have a feeling that it keeps happening like this, but I don't know how to prevent it or what would happen if I did. I feel aimless, purposeless, lacking a sense of direction. You should know what I'm talking about. Everyone's felt it at some point, I'm sure. Not knowing what to do or why, not knowing if anything really matters, not really caring, not really caring that you don't care. There's a vague sense that I'm missing something, and I think about the homework I need to get done that I'm not doing, or the college applications, or the people I want to talk to. Sometimes things just don't occur to me. I do what I'm doing because I don't see the other options, don't remember them...

#18

Yes, yes, I know, I need to go to bed.

My taste in men has been somewhat redeemed.

That time of year again

...when I start failing all my classes. First quarter, every year, I get good grades, but by the time second quarter rolls around, I just stop caring. It's aggravating. I hate school. I shouldn't hate it. I like learning. I like talking to my friends. I like thinking and analyzing my thoughts. But it just isn't working for me. I'be given up doing anything in comp sci. I've stopped doing history assignments. I haven't done any math since 12.3, and we're now up to 12.10. I think there might be a test tomorrow. And yet, I just don't want to do it. And I'm not making myself do it, because I don't want to. That shouldn't be enough of an excuse to not do it. But if that's the case, why am I not doing my homework?

Ah, well. I just can't wait to get out of high school. But after that comes college, where I'm even more independent. So, say I make it through college. What then? A job I don't care about? Doing things I don't want to do just so I can eat? Will I be able to force myself through 40 years of doing something I hate if I can't even force myself to do more than 10 weeks of what I strongly dislike? What kind of a life is that, anyways?

The Tragedie of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark

To be or not to be - that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles
And, by opposing, end them. To die, to sleep -
No more - and by a sleep to say we end
The heartache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to - 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep -
To sleep, perchance to dream. Ay, there's the rub,
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause. There's the respect
That makes calamity of so long life.
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
Th' oppressors wrong, the proud man's contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law's delay,
The insolence of office, and the spurns
That patient merit of th' unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscovered country from whose bourn
No traveler returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all,
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pitch and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry
And lose the name of action.

you can no longer complain

http://www.geocities.com/ekino_kirai/senior_pictures.htm

konnichiwa!

Over the weekend, we bought FFXI. It's interesting so far. It looks like it'll be fun, once I figure out the controls.

I also bought a 33-cd set of Talk Now! with 33 languages. It's quite exciting. Kind of. I was fiddling around with the German one, and learned some vocab. Bitte being one of the only things I can actually remember. Wait.. there's also zwei in there somewhere. And milche.

Of the 33 languages, there are maybe 10 that I want to learn, or at least, think would be fun to learn. They are: Arabic, Cantonese, French, German, Hebrew, Hindi, Irish (have to assume they mean Gaelic), Italian, Japanese, and Russian.

I came up with the idea for our TOK presentation. Yay! They liked my idea!

I wonder what it'll be like in college. Will I still find myself surrounded by people nerdier than myself? Or will I gravitate toward the less nerdy crowd, and discuss coffee, strange people, and temperature, instead of chess, grammar, and the matrix?

Apparently my painting is in the art display hallway place downstairs. That's kind of cool. No name tag, though, as Mrs. Brown didn't put one up. I remain anonymous.

something's got to give

It's just odd, that's all. I don't know. Maybe I'm falling out of love. I was never "in love" in the first place. But it still feels almost as if that's what's been happening. It hurts me less, and it bothers me more. I just don't like feeling like there's nothing I can do or say to make him want to have me around. And it makes it worse when there is someone else, who is willing to listen, who seems to enjoy talking to me, and even listening. And I can't blame him, because it's unfair to say he has to be happy when he isn't, or he has to be interested when I'm uninteresting, or he has to think of something to say when I can't either. And I don't want to blame him, because I do care, and when he's happy and when he says things he's so engaging and it's wonderful to be around him. But I just can't be satisfied with waiting for those rare occasions when he's happy and he wants me around. Maybe if there were more there, or something I could depend on, or something to let me know that he enjoyed my presence. And one of the things that bothers me most, not about him specifically, just about my life in general, what bothers me most is when things aren't changing, when they just stay the same and I'm not making any progress and there's no real promise that I can ever make progress. In a lot of ways, that's what I feel is happening. It's not fair to lay the blame on him; I don't blame him. But I can't let myself be miserable because I care about him, either.

Wow, that was long and rambling. But it doesn't really matter, does it? Because it's my blog. Sometimes other people will censor themselves if they get a lot of flak for an entry they make. Then they complain bitterly about how they should be able to post what they want on their own blog. I agree... but I think if you're going to complain, don't even censor yourself. Either make the decision to censor yourself, acknowledging the fact that your views upset other people and you care about other people enough to modify what you put on your blog. Or keep up your post and deal with the fact that some people will not like what you put up there... Of course, since I always came too late to see what the offending posts were, I guess I can't make an informed decision... Ah, well. C'est la vie.

aaaaaaaaaaaaargh

current mp3: 12 variations on 'Ah, vous dirai-je maman' - mozart (aka Twinkle Twinkle Little Star mozart-style)

*stabs the history homework*

Well, joy. At least tomorrow's a Wednesday, so I can sleep in a whole half hour. That's right! I can wake up at 5:30! Isn't that wonderful?

I still don't have chapters 6 & 7 done for science... I'm starting to feel bad, because I slack off on the homework in that class, and Fox thinks it's because I don't care. Which may be true. But, still, I like that class better than some of my other classes, though. Maybe.

I learned something about perl today... that was fun. For some people, there are certain things you can talk about with them and you're almost guaranteed to have fun. I especially love talking to my nerds (they're mine! all mine!) about computer games or programming or quantum physics or things like that. Although I also love talking to the normal IB people (still probably more nerdy than 90% of the population) about rabid squirrels and getting high on cough drop medication. Or whatever else.

I still don't get the grammar club t-shirts.

I now have numbers 1-5 on my ladder at broad-minded. Now I have to wait while Anthony fixes his code. .... done yet? No? ... how about now? ... how about now? ... how about now? ...

It's only two days after school's back in session and I already need another break.

yatta, ne

... I should be in bed by now, but I just haven't gotten around to it yet.

Today was a good day. I attempted to explain part of it to Claire on the way to English, but I don't think she understood. Perhaps it was the phrasing. To be more precise, he walked with me. I really appreciate walking somewhere and having a boy notice me enough to talk to me while I do. So that's the explanation for that particular happiness. But, I was also happy about senior pictures (baylee and kym!), the conversation in physics (kill bill is, indeed, awesome), computer science class (sometimes flirting with juniors and non-IB nerds can be fun, too!), lunch (hoorah for fake documentaries), history (jokes, pop rocks, weird notes and pizza purchasing), and the ever-popular Knowledge Bowl. Sarah commented on my "fondness", as is apparent on here. The joy. It is true, though. And Katsnelson thought it was strange. Ha! He's probably better liked by me than he knows, but he's still only number four... The best part was probably being claimed, without even having to do the claiming. Yesss! That was awesome. Makes me feel special. And the fact that I was on the team with two of the smart people (there are three) didn't hurt, nor did the fact that we won free chipotle. Mmm...

So, I hope the bunny feels better tomorrow. Boys can be very evil, but as far as my experience today went, they can be very nice sometimes too. Sickness is icky, but hopefully Sailor Moon will help. I'll even do the Cartman voice, for your benefit. "Screw you guys! I'm going to bed!"

depression, bloodshed, and bad candy

Thursday
My parents fought. Dad threatened divorce, like he always does. I turned off SSX without saving. My mother and I pondered the meaningless of our lives. As always, a cheerful day.

Friday
All candy purchased was icky to discourage candy gorging. Dressed somewhat like Rinoa. Wrong colors, but oh well. And I refused to wear the dumb denim skirt and spandex shorts. Still, with socks and a ribbon on the arms, it was cool. Kill Bill was lovely. As was noted by my companion, the music was quite trippy. Too braindead to figure out the symbolism, though.

He did call... but I was going to the movies. It was nice that he called, although I kind of poked him into it... Meh. Oh well. I don't really regret that I went to the movies instead, though, as it was hella fun. Yes, hella.

Saturday
Attempts to read East of Eden and work on DBQ resulted in restlessness. Forbidden SSX-ing resulted in extreme depression. Food helped, but not entirely. Dad came home and demanded I work only on reading East of Eden. The result was depression. Food, again, helped. Came home and was forced to read again, resulting in depression. Book became more interesting, resulting in complacency. Nikki called, resulting in contentment.

so I'm lazy, too bad

I find that I don't post much when I'm on vacation. During school, I'll post daily, but when there's no schoolwork to be done I just don't get around to blogging.

I've been playing Animal Crossing and SSX3 far too much for my own good. I really need to read East of Eden and do that damned DBQ.

I was going to volunteer for Trick or Treat Street, but they already had enough volunteers. I was going to go horseback riding with my mother, but the instructor was evil incarnate and we wasted about $230 and a lot of time. I was going to do some homework today, but I procrastinated it even more. However, I have succeeded in getting a peak 2 pass for Zoe... Does that count for anything?

My days seem to be rather meaningless, my life may end up being rather meaningless... but I'm starting to question whether this is a bad thing. Most people live their lives without achieving anything great or even finding a driving purpose to guide them. At least, that's my impression of the world. So, why should I be discontent with a similarly pointless existence? If the main goal of our species is to procreate, why should I feel a need to do anything more significant than produce a line of depressed descendants? It bothers me to think that I won't amount to anything important, but at the same time, I can feel myself care less and less about trying. As my agitation increases, my ambition decreases. Or something like that.

Ah, well. Don't start getting depressed, or anything. Think about cake, or something, instead. Isn't that better? Mmmm... Cake...

voice recognition blows

So, I am using voice recognition. It's really terrible. However, I am learning how to use it Without stabbing it to death.

yes This really does suck

Ok, I'm done. I put the type that was spoken in italics. After getting frustrated with saying "backspace" too many times, I just started using the keyboard. Very sad.

fall break is here! Hoorah!

between the bars

So, apparently, I have homework over break. Gore gave us a DBQ. Dammit. Due monday... Oh, but, that monday we have knowledge bowl. So I'm happy now. Yes, it's true, knowledge bowl makes me happy. In history earlier this week we were talking about splitting up the smart people into separate teams. "I want to be on Michael's team!" "Katsnelson?" "No, he's mean!" "He's not that bad, he's a lot better than last year..." It was kind of funny. But I guess I will have to come early, or every girl in the class will claim Chaffin 'fore I do.

But, good news: no homework for tomorrow. Hoorah. At least, if there is homework, I ain't doin' it. Nope. No siree. I don't think there is, though. At most, there's math. And y'know what? I'm not doing it! Ha!

Nikki didn't call me last night. That made me sad. We need to do something over break.

... Elliott Smith. That makes me very sad. I just hope nobody I know feels like they need to do something like that.

On a happier note, today our comp sci class walked over to Juice Stop. It was good times. Jason and Ian (C.) were arguing over whose smoothies were better: Juice Stop or Bagelicious. I have a feeling both of them were biased, because Jason works for Bagelicious, and Ian works for Juice Stop, and they were both arguing for their own store. But Ann and Vicki played speed, and Greg and Aaron played chess, and we all drank expensive smoothies. Very fun. And when we got back, I watched in amusement as Jason struggled with his fifteen billion loops.

I changed my layout again, because I've discovered that I can't go long without a black background. I don't know what it is with me and light colors, but we just can't seem to get along. It's like the rain. A lot of people seem to see it as depressing, but I find it comforting.

attention deficit disorder

I was talking to Eric about ritalin today... It was interesting. He asked me if I was hyper a lot, at which point I informed him that ADD in girls is different from ADD in boys. Guys are more likely to have ADHD, anyways. But when I'm hyper, it's not necessarily in a way that people can tell. I get restless, and I feel like I have to get away from people. So I'm not just jumping up and down and bouncing around everywhere (though I have been known to do that, too), I'm getting away, trying to burn off my energy, in a way. Mostly, I'm not hyper, I just hide inside myself when I'm overstimulated. Daydreams, and hyperfocusing, all to block out all the stupid sensory stimulation of you peoples... Come to think of it, I was going to take a ritalin... two hours ago. No wonder I haven't gotten any homework done.

That's all, for now.

meaningless rambling, yet again

I finished my calc homework (more or less) and signed up for that trick or treat street thing at the children's museum...

I don't talk philosophically, as much, anymore. One might wonder why this is occurring. Do I enjoy reflection less? Am I keeping my philosophy to myself? Am I bored with thinking? Am I tired of learning? One would hope that this is not the case... thinking and learning are lovely, and should not be dispensed with. However, this is a troublesome issue indeed. Why is it that I have stopped reflecting about philosophical questions? Note the lack of horror on the part of my classmates, who in the past might have complained about the TOK-like aspects of this blog. Is this due to a lack of caring, an increase in acceptance, or a decrease in reflection? I believe it is this last item, for these entries as of late have been filled with such banalities as "I didn't go to art club today" and "I hate the extended essay."

Ok, anyways, away from that weird voice. It's scaring me somewhat. But I do hope that my blog doesn't become so uninteresting as to incur the wrath of, say, Matt, Ian, Paul, Chris, Ned, Sarah, Vicki, Ashley, Mary... um... Never mind. Though I'm not sure it matters anyway, because very few people actually read this... though I'm always surprised by new people who've come here and left random comments.

I really need to get to bed, but before I do, I would like to state that my mouse is spawn of hell and should not be allowed out in public. I'm too lazy to get a new mouse, though...

meh

Don't wanna do the science homework, don't wanna do the history homework. Thank god that I have an A in comp sci for quarter regardless of how much I slack off this week. *cheers* I like that class. It's so easy since I know C++. Tee hee. And it's always fun to talk to the other nerds.

Also praise heaven for english. I'll read east of eden during break, I guess, but I'm not doing anything else for that class! Nope! Nothing! I refuse!

Today was a surprisingly good day. I discovered that red ink can be quite scary, as an evil man with a red pen gave me a 17 on my tok essay. Granted, it wasn't a very good essay, but still. I've never seen that much red on an essay. Course, Droege gave me 5 more points, and that's the grade that counts, but it's still frightening. Baylee and I bonded.

Then there was the ogling of Samurai Chess. Yup. That was fun. It was quite amusing to listen to Alex and Chaffin start going off about different chess strategies... I wish I were a better player, or at least, that I remembered some of the names of moves from middle school.

Today was knowledge bowl, and I was late, again, which was disappointing. Though I did earn a quarter of the team's points! Seeing as how we got 4 points... And the winning team got 21 points... Sad. Course, it's kind of hard to compete against a team consisting of both Krishna and Katsnelson... damn you smart peoples! Unfair advantage! All our team had was Shivani (who left early) and Matt. And me. Of course. Not a particularly strong team, excepting Shivani... S'ok. Next week we'll get 'em...

Oh, and Sarah and Chaffin were there... yay... that made me happy... even though they were on the other team... Dammit. I need to come early next time and get dibs on the smart peoples. But, anna and Katsnelson being there was also quite exciting, since I never see them! What the heck? All the biology people (okay, maybe not all of them) have been taken away from me, and it makes me sad, because I like many of the biology people. Alas.

But, damn you, Chaffin, now I have to do the math homework.

won't you please

I saw the music video for Perfect Time of Day yesterday, and after expecting some 40-year old to be singing (don't know why, I just did), I was pleasantly surprised to see (in my mind) a hot 20-or so year old. Yes, indeed. Though I was also pleasantly surprised to find that he did "Help!" on the I am Sam soundtrack, which was the one song on the cd that I thought was more true to the original song than the original was. John had said that they had turned a rather unhappy song into a peppy, "beatles-y" tune, which didn't really fit the song. I remember when I originally heard the howie day version, I thought it was properly depressed sounding. Very nice...

There was a certain commercial on the same music videos program (I'd recorded it on the tivo... I love my tivo) that was... interesting. Suffice it to say that I found it quite nice, and that many many people probably wouldn't. I forced nikki to watch it with me, so she knows what I'm talking about. As for the rest of you... you probably don't know and couldn't even guess, since I'm not particularly open about that particular... aspect?

I did pretty much no homework this weekend, and god, what a relief. I've got to do this more often - work like hell for a few weeks, then do absolutely nothing productive for a few days. It's great fun.

and a new layout, too

I dropped chocolate cake on the floor. How sad.

Fall break is going to be such a relief. End of quarter, no extended essay to worry about, no homework. Hopefully I can talk to people and DO something, because if this just ends up as another year of sitting on my butt all break, I'll be sad. Course, I'll be doing CAS stuff (I might be able to get 50 hours from this trick or treat street thing! eeee!) but it might be nice to have something of a social life, as well... anybody wanna go see a movie, or something?

I started watching Ghost in the Shell yesterday, but I didn't finish it... It's good so far, though. I wonder if artificial intelligence could actually be made to be like human intelligence, so much so that machines had "souls"? ... eh, I don't know.

What homework do I have that's due monday? TOK, calc. Though I should work on science. I might want to finish that lab.

I'm still in such a good mood. No more extended essay! Wheeeeeee!

done till january

"Free at last, free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"

and with documented sources, too

Bwahahaha! Done before midnight! ... Just barely.

I just used up 40 pages on this... that must be equal to a small tree, or something. RIP, sapling.

So, 'sbeen an interesting week. Much has happened that I can no longer recall, due to the fact that I haven't been blogging and what with my poor memory, not much stays up there that long.

So... art club, didn't go, alas. That made me sad. I was sickish and ended up going home because I really didn't feel like being ignored or dealing with math. I had already skipped TOK, so it wasn't that much of a deal for me to just blow off the rest of the day, too.

But I saw Katsnelson during my tree-circlings (waiting for your mum to come pick you up can get boring) and we talked for all of two seconds. Wow. But, dude, he's doing french independent study, he's even more insane than I thought. Wish I still saw him, I miss his nerdiness. It made me want to be productive. Now I'm just around all the IB slackers. Ivey: "I still haven't started my extended essay..." That was monday, I believe.

So, tuesday, sickish, stayed home from school. Wednesday, still sickish, but came to school regardless. Thursday, less sickish, came to school. I brought oreos to TOK but was upstaged by Nick's bagels. Mmm, bagels...

Amazingly enough, in art class, even though I missed two days of the current project, I actually finished it today. This seems bizarre to me. The charcoal project took me two extra days. Do I just not care about tempera? Although I did use a lot of watering down of the paint, so I could just fill the whole bloody area at once. Great big splotches of color!

Today in math was the funtabulous computer lab graphing calculator day. I ran out of things to graph about 30 minutes into the period, seeing as how the lousy version they have currently can't even do z^2 or multiple functions at once. Talk about cheezy. So I started fiddling with cos and n, then got bored, and watched in amusement/puzzlement as everybody started using simpletext and making the computer talk. Brings back those good old memories from Lane's class. Something about hearts and spoons, eh?

So... some ditching going on in science wednesday, I noticed. At least two people came back later in the day. One showed up in comp sci and the other in english. For shame. But, what, are you people just oversleeping or something? I know the comp sci boy was.

But, oh, it's weird to know who Jason is now (course, I've known him for about 8 weeks, so can I really say "now"?) and then read Matt's quotes of him about the math final. I can hear it now, too, which is somewhat freaky. As in, when I read the quote, I substitute in his actual voice... Anybody else do that? It's quite amusing. Or if you read someone's blog in somebody else's voice, other than the person who originally wrote it, though I only do that when I'm really bored. Or not thinking. I start to read Anthony's blog in anna's voice once. Very strange...

Anyhoo. Next monday is the second knowledge bowl meeting. I'm not expecting anybody to come. If my dad hasn't eaten all the oreos by then I might bring the paltry remains.

I have decided that Greg is "cool". As in, he goes on my list of nerds who I find amusing.

And now, time for bed, because a) I'm still slightly sickish and b) I'm way too hyper, or something, to be coherent / comprehensible / understandable / sane.

*stabs extended essay with a sharpened spork*

Sie liebt dich, yah, yah, yah!

must... get... sleep...

"I honestly thought he was gonna ditch again(to do homework, that honorary IBer!)." <-- Heh.

Apparently, I'm an AP scholar. How cool. I feel special now. ^.^

Yatta! Finally done with history. Well, for the most part. It's good enough.

Jeez, I had way too much homework to help, anyways. Not to mention the whole not having a car thing...

Chris was much more amiable today. We both got angry about the school paper. It was lovely, in a horrible, horrible way. Apparently it was better than last year, though. I generally avoided the paper last year... On the grammar front, however, I don't think I'll ever be as anal as Anthony. Just look at the crud I'm writing now.

Oh, and on a strange note... I saw Baylee and Corey at Albertson's, but they didn't see me... and a few minutes later, I was wandering around the store seeing if I could find them again... but they were gone. Hallucinations, perhaps? Maybe I should lay off the sugar.

say yes

I kind of take back what I said yesterday. Not to say it doesn't bug me, and not to say that it's ok, but I can't expect people to be perfect. It isn't fair to expect someone to not talk about these things every once in a while. If I expect so much of people, I'll just end up disappointed in mankind. And I'll end up hating myself, too.

Sometimes I think that I can't hurt him, or that he hurts me more than I hurt him. That's stupid. I really don't think he means to hurt me, and I know that I don't mean to hurt him, but that doesn't mean that I can't or that I don't. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I haven't hurt him. And if I asked him about it, he might not tell me if he had been hurt. But he doesn't seem happy. So, new strategy, then. No avoidance. It seems better when I'm happy, so that's what I'll try. I'll be cheerful. It's better for me, too.

There was no art club today. This makes me sad. Although I did get to see Sarah yesterday for knowledge bowl... If anyone came because of my pestering, I'm thankful. It's nice to have people I know there. Course, in history, everyone assumes that the people who came who weren't from my class will return. Sara commented on how "into it" Chris was. I should ask him, next time I see him... I'm not as sure that they'll all come back. Heh.

(don't run away)

Well, I worked on CAS and the EE, and neither of them is even close to being anything you could possibly consider "done", and yet, it's ok. I did something, at least.

because I need to say it

I really don't like it when you complain about people. All of you, any of you. You don't have to be so mean. And you're not listing the real reasons. There are very few people who bother me, and that's because they don't seem to like me. They're very nice people, but they don't like me. There is one person I don't like very much because he won't go away when he's gotten on my nerves. But he's a nice person, and I don't have the right to judge him. Acting slutty or asking dumb questions or doing what your best friend does or too much pda or being friendly to different people aren't valid reasons to dislike someone. If you're not willing to name the real reason, why say anything at all? Some people are my friends. My friends bitching about my friends isn't fun to hear. The people I have the most respect for, out of all of you, are the ones I haven't heard complaining about this girl or that guy. And if I ever hear you complain about them I lose a little more respect. I'm not saying you shouldn't be free to speak your mind but keep in mind that I don't like it. And every time I put someone down I feel terrible. Just because I don't speak up on someone's defense doesn't mean it doesn't bother me when people say mean things about them. I hope I never ever do it. Because when I do, and I think about it afterwards, I hate myself for it.

That's all. And I know I'm a hypocrite sometimes. But I hate it more in myself than in other people.

Other than that, today was ok. I'm going to leave him alone for awhile, if I can remember. I just don't know how to stop bugging him other than staying away. I can tell he's not happy and I don't want to make him that way. It's better for me too, because he brings me down when he gets like that, and I just make things worse by hanging around.

I'm not nearly as bitter as I seem. I'm actually in a much better mood than I was in earlier.

damn allergies

I appear to be very, very allergic to Alex's cat. While I was over there, I couldn't stop sneezing, and now that I'm home I keep coughing. Meh. But I'm pretty sure I'm not sick because I stopped sneezing almost immediately after coming home. My mom's allergic to cats, too. Not all of them, just some of them. Guess that must be true about me too, since I've been around other cats and not had any kind of reaction.

I need to clean up my office now so I don't have to do it tomorrow before I go to school. I don't wanna. Meh, I'll just have to do it anyway.

We took senior pictures (again) today. So, yeah. But this time I actually liked the pictures, and no editing was needed, and my face wasn't unnaturally pale or contrasty or pimply. So, hooray! And dad removed the lenses from my glasses, so no glare, either. I really like this one, and I think it's going in the yearbook. The good thing about senior year: you actually get to choose what goes in the yearbook, so you don't get stuck with something completely horrible. At least, as long as all of the pictures you've taken aren't horrible.

I'm in a better mood today, I've noticed... This is a good thing.

depression sets in

current song: no name #3 - elliott smith

I wasn't as happy yesterday as I've been lately. I don't know why.

I'm wearing the pedometer. Hopefully I'll walk a sufficient number of steps today.

I feel like I'm losing my grip, but I don't really know how to recover. Maybe I just don't want to. None of it seems very real to me. I'm not thinking about anything except the present. I can't just live for the present. It means the present won't change. I want it to change, but if that's so, I have to start thinking about the future too. It's just hard. I'm stuck where I am, and it takes so much energy to do things differently that I just haven't bothered. I guess I need to bother.

I find it strange that although I find two names equally valid for a person, I'll think one and say and write the other. Or I always refer to them using one name, but when I'm talking to them I call them the other. You'd think I use only one of the names, but when I think about the person I usually use the other name.

My mom says she feels bad for making Michael not tease the dog. My dad always teases her... She's like, "Let him know that he doesn't have to keep still and not go near her. She's never going to like him anyway."

It's kind of sad when you weigh approximately the same thing as your science teacher. Though I don't take off my clothes... ew.

I've been thinking about materialism and I believe that holding value in a cd isn't necessarily materialistic. If you want the cd in order to listen to the music, you value the cd for the music, the way the music makes you feel. That doesn't seem to be material to me. Unless you want the cd so that you can brag about the vast numbers of cds you've bought...

nitrous oxide?

Waiii! I feel special...

Today was quite exciting. We watched more of Pi (though we still haven't finished it... you'd think with an hour and a half class period it wouldn't take this long) and at one point Droege pulls out his pi sheet, and says, "I want you to get out a piece of paper, and write something down..." And he gets to 3.141 before Matt starts reciting what he's memorized of it. About 140 digits. Yeesh. I'm not going to memorize any more. I got to 100 yesterday and that's where I'm going to stay. Besides, I can't keep up with Matt's pace... How sad.

2nd period I didn't go to the lunchroom this time. Nope. I went to the math resource center instead, and hung out with Matt till he left for therapy. Then I was surprised when Shivani sat with me. Hoorah! We complained about the homework together, it was a bonding experience.

Then to lunch, and nobody's around. I'm like, Why aren't there people?? But Chaffin walks in, and about 30 seconds later Chris walked in so it was all good. Sitting at the table were Taifur, Chris, Anthony, Chaffin, and Joel, I believe. Good times. edit: Nathan was there as well.

Then the interminable wait as herds of teachers emptied out of Cavnar's room. He talked with a couple stragglers for about 15 minutes as we waited outside. And then he wouldn't even let us hold class outside. Where is the justice?!

Ah, but I tell my mom this, and she found it funny:

"So, a nitrogen and three oxygen walk into a bar... Isn't that a gas?"
"No! N-O!"

Drawing class was like normal, we've started painting now... But, after class ended, I was taking too long packing up and all the MSA kids start filtering in... and then I see Cagri walk in with Andre. It was freaky, Andre was the only white kid there.

"Multimedia keys to control audio and video directly from the keyboard"

The power of pi

Base 23:

3.35kh9k813jk9g9d60jj1
570lia3cmbm3l2jkm490
97g1ggi869m5724ck6h5
0jk0mgbb021c0f5576ef
95abc

Indeed. Yes, children, today was filled with pi-ness. In TOK we watched part of the movie Pi. It's quite interesting so far. In math, after completing another packet from hell (this was from a lesser hell, though) the juniors gathered together and wrote pi on the board. There was also an attempt to write it in binary, but this yielded unsatisfactory results.

Other than that, there was the joy of talking to Alex during lunch (and the desecration of Noam Chomsky), stealing Corey's calculator, eating the starburst graciously provided by Eric, and attending my first art club meeting this year. Hoorah.

Down with Mathematica! for it is hella expensive and does not go above base 36. For shame.

A Good Day

I liked Ivey's reaction to the chocolate. "Wow, THAT took a lot of thought... oh, wait... Oh! Thank you!" Ha ha ha. She'd forgotten about the lunch conversation. Yeah, but, today was not bad, especially for a 5-8 day. (I refuse to call them red and green days. Especially since I've forgotten which is which.) Talking to Greg in comp sci was really fun. Parsons helped me cut out part of my extended essay. (good bye locke! I won't miss you!) And one conversation is really great. It's all I need from him. It helped that I was in a good mood from talking to my other friends. And I talked to Vicky in comp sci, which was nice. I don't normally talk to people. Erm, that I don't know well. But I'm going to try to be more outgoing.

I saw Sara, and Alex and Chris, and Anthony and Paul, all at different times of the day, but still, I saw them. I waved to Sara, and she said hi. It's weird, because now there's a chance they'll recognize me. Before no one would even have noticed.

I got my second amazon order today. Something for my mom (Susan Tedeschi) and something for me, OK Computer. Yes, I am trying to expand my music collection, why do you ask? Just because I've bought three cds in the past week...

Now, off to my drawing homework.

Even more random than you'd thought was possible

quiero que no exista el tiempo
detener este momento
una vida es poco para mí

Meh, well, I've made an outline for my e.e. and read a chapter in Beyond Good and Evil, done a crappy job on my history homework, attempted but immediately given up on the TOK papers, written a program in java that I wasn't assigned, neglected my art homework, done 9 physics questions/problems, and got cheesy presents for Ivey and Eric. A ghirardelli milk chocolate square for Ivey, as we had been talking about it during lunch on thursday and she had mentioned that she liked anything ghirardelli, and later that night, me and mum go out to jason's deli and BEHOLD - ghirardelli chocolate squares for sale. Eric's was a box of rice candies, since he gave me the sticker from one once, and he knows I like the japanese stuff, and so it would make sense coming from me, so yeah. Besides, who doesn't like rice candies? But I digress.

Taking pictures is fun. I've determined that a better light source makes my pictures less blurry. Why is this? Nevertheless, I like many of the blurrier pictures better. They seem to have more "character", or something.

I got amazon stuff over the weekend. Dizzy up the girl (Goo Goo Dolls), El Viaje de copperpot by Oreja de Van Gogh, and Gattaca. Gattaca was on sale and I liked it a lot when I first saw it. Neither of my parents have seen it, they both said they might want to watch it with me. So, I bought it. It's my first amazon order. Nifty. I have to make sure I don't get addicted though. Must conserve my money!

Sadly, mum couldn't find Ender's Shadow. And I thought our house had every book ever written in it. We probably do have it, just buried under piles of other books buried under piles of crap that came with us when we moved... 10 years ago. Wow. Been a long time, eh? Oh, but apparently Matt moved in second grade too, just a little before I did, so I didn't know he was a newbie too. I found this out several weeks ago... Why do I remember it just now? No explanation. Nobody knows. ...

I left my tapes in fox's classroom. Did I mention this? Pinocchio/Sleeping Beauty/something else, Cinderella, and simpsons, though I know not what episode. They're old, so presumably it's an early one.

I have a better senior picture now, I hope. I looked at the batch we took and chose my favorite, and since it was the wrong format I used the clone brush to make it vertical (rather than horizontal), and I think it now works. So yay! I have a better senior picture!

Don't mind the rambling. Tonight I'm rather random. I feel moreso than usual, and that's pretty scary.

edit: The Generated Color Chart of DOOM